It's official!

So Monday was my official date of my divorce. A friend once told me, "you never forget you're first. First kiss, first xxx, first divorce!" I honestly wish we could have parted ways still being friends, but there's just too much of a difference between us. I find this funny since we have been with each other for soooooo long. Alas, people change. Or in my case, didn't change.

My mom called me the other day to wish me congratulations on my divorce. I thought that was funny. Then she started to say that I should let her choose my next girlfriend, but stopped short if stating so. She realized that she did choose the ex, lol.

So what's happening, I'm finally moving out. I'm easing my hands of this entire thing. Walking away and never turning back. Today (actually Monday) will end this transitional chapter that I've been stuck in for way to long. My next post will be from my new place, where I can rebuild. To until next time.

Oops

<p>Checked out my paperwork...still married, well until the 24th that is. How I messed up on the date I haven't got a clue.</p>

The day its finally here!

Tomorrow it will be final. I will be officially divorced. I will no longer be attached to the women that I spent the last 3 years calling my wife. Looking back six months posted by fairly quickly.

Looking back, and rating all the things that I had written and recorded, both published and unpublished, I've come a long way. I've gone from my world tumbling down around me to actually being happy again. From crying (yes I'll admit to crying) every night to sleeping the whole night through. From being hurt and confused about what to do with my life to moving in a new direction.

Its amazing how much  can change in 6 months, but for now, I'll just stop here until everything is final. So until tomorrow.

Two weeks

Two more weeks and I'm a free man. Two more weeks and this chapter can be closed. Two weeks.

Also, have you ever noticed that after Monday and Tuesday, even the calendar says W - T - F?

Really? Trying to have her cake and east it too!

As I've mentioned previously, I'm dating someone new, and she its dating the guy that was "just a friend." Most nights she doesn't even come home anymore. Well on a recent night, my girlfriend leaves and she happens to come home. And a situation develops.

She's getting 60 of the 60/40 split on the equity if the house, but expects me to pay 50% of the mortgage. What's that all about? I tell get that I'm going to only pay 40% since that us how much I'll be getting when the use is sold...she flips. She  saying that it isn't fair. That I'm home more often than she is and I bring my girlfriend over etc. Hey, I never told her not to come home. I never told her to spend nights at his house. It's get choice not to come home. Right?

She goes on to talk about how I'm immature and a bastard, and asked when I'm going to grow up. I don't get this whole thing. She then starts to bring up things from the past about how debts aren't getting paid that were in her name before we were married, and how unfair it is that she is paying for them, and that debts were paid when we were married, etc, again...I'm confused. Lost again. Everyone I deal with her, she makes new feel like I'm this bad guy for standing top for myself.

I really don't understand her. Does she really expect me to just give her everything? Is that wheawhat I'm suppose to do?

Dating: Too Soon?

When should I start dating? How much time should pass? Should I wait for the "ink to dry," or get a head start now?

I was talking with a good friend of mine and he commented that I'm dealing with this whole thing pretty well. I've "recovered" (if I can use that word) quicker than he did, and that I look happy. I went on a couple of dates a while back, and I have to say I was nervous as a mother. Things, to me felt awkward, but much of that had to do with the fact that I hadn't been on a date is over a decade. I was dating someone new, and I'll be honest, I'm was much more comfortable with her, but again, I ask..."I'm I dating to early?" Is there a right or wrong time to start dating again, or does it just happen? Is there a time when I should start? Allow some time pass then get back up on that horse, or just be like the Nike slogan, Just Do It!

Well, I'm here to say that I thought I was going to wait...give it some time. However, life did not want my life to go that route. I'm dating someone...were taking it slow, but I'll say it serious. Serious enough for me to say that we're exclusive. I know, it's very soon...but hey, it just happened.

Dreaming Again

I've been dreaming again. It's kind of weird really. Normally I don't remember the dreams that I have, but I know that I've had a dream. However, when my life drastically changed, well I didn't remember dreaming very much. Now, I'm not sure if I was or wasn't dreaming, I just can't recall if I did or didn't. Dreams are interesting.


Some say dreams are our subconsciousness revealing things to us that we don't want to, or can't deal with consciously yet. Others take dreams as being literal, a cow in your dream is just a cow in your dream. Some think that dreams are windows into the future, that each thing that you dream of is an omen. I'm not sure which school of thought is correct, and honestly I'm not sure if I want to know. How about I just tell you about my dream, and you can decide what it's about.


The Dream
So I slept the first night through without waking up somewhere in the middle of it. Which is a huge accomplishment. Not sure when I was dreaming about, but I'm going to guess is was futureish. I had my own place and my ex was in it. (BTW, giving the short version). I'm assuming it was close to signing or we just signed our papers, making everything official. I was in my place, and she came over. We talked. She was asking for something (memory of the dream is slipping away as I type this) and apparently didn't like my answer. She left, I woke up.


Hmm, come to think of it, that's now a very good explanation of a dream...hahaha. Well, I'll try an remember better next dream. I'm glad that I'm dreaming again. It means things are getting back to "normal" right? Oh well.